Surrogacy is the carrying of a pregnancy for people who are unable to do so themselves. 

There are two types of surrogacy – traditional surrogacy and gestational surrogacy.

Traditional surrogacy: the surrogate uses her own eggs, along with the intended father’s or donated sperm. This may be through IUI, IVF, or home insemination.

Gestational surrogacy: the baby carried by the surrogate does not contain any of her genetic material. IVF is necessary in this case, where either the intended mother’s egg or a donor’s egg is combined with the intended father’s or donated sperm to create embryos and placed into the surrogate’s uterus.

Source: Fertility NZ

In New Zealand, surrogacies are an altruistic arrangement on the part of the surrogate mother and it’s illegal to pay her more than her reasonable expenses.

Some surrogacies occur by in-vitro fertilisation (IVF) and are arranged through a fertility clinic. These surrogate arrangements need to be approved by the Ethics Committee on Assisted Reproductive Technology (ECART), to make sure the surrogacy arrangement is in the best interests of the child.

At the time of birth, the child’s legal parents will be the surrogate mother and her partner, if she has one. The intending parent(s) must apply to adopt the child and be approved by Oranga Tamariki in order to become the child’s legal parent(s).

Some traditional surrogacies, where the surrogate mother’s egg is used, are completed privately and don’t involve a fertility clinic and ECART. The intending parent or parents are still required to complete an adoption order for the child to have a legal relationship with them. 

Source: Oranga Tamariki

If you would like a perspective on what a surrogacy journey looks like in New Zealand, check out this article from Stuff - click article link here.

Our first preference is for a “gestational surrogacy” as we plan to create embryos through IVF using our sperm and a friend’s donated eggs.

We are open to traditional surrogacy if we connect with a person that has a preference for this form of surrogacy and if home insemination is an option, our preference would be artificial insemination* (learn more about artificial insemination - click here).

*Artificial insemenation - sperm is inserted into the vagina using a syringe or similar device.

In our eyes, a person who has a desire to become a surrogate is selfless, compassionate, empathetic and just an all round AMAZING human being - if that’s you, keep reading. Your wellbeing is important to us and if we’re lucky enough to have you to consider being a surrogate for us, please think about the following:

• Are you 1000% sure that you want to be a surrogate and if you have a partner, do you have their full support?
  “If you’re thinking about being a surrogate, but not 100% sure about it just yet, and want to learn more about us and the process, we’d still love to hear from you if you have any questions. It’s a big decision in life to consider being a surrogate, and we promise not to pressure you into anything”.

• Have you and your partner, if you have one, completed your beautiful family? i.e. no future plans on having more children of your own.

• Are you over 20 and under 40 years of age and have an uncomplicated pregnancy history, and in a good health (physical/mental)?
  “We encourage you to speak with a medical professional about your suitability for surrogacy”.

• Do you have similar values and outlook on life to the intending parents(us)?
  “If we are not known to each other, we must build and nurture a relationship for a minimum of 6 months. We don’t necessarily have to like all the same things or agree on everything, but having similar values and outlook on life will no doubt help us all make meaningful connections”. Find out what our values are - click here.

• Are you a good communicator?
  “We’ll be on this journey together through the good, the bad and the in between. Being comfortable with each other to have honest, open, non-judgemental coversations will be very important”.

Financial support: New Zealand law makes it illegal to financially compensate a surrogate. However, we will cover all costs related to the pregnancy (including medical bills), your legal fees, counselling sessions, travel, maternity clothing etc. And if you’d llike some free range eggs, say no more, plus Ryan is a pretty solid baker!

Mental and physical wellbeing support: We’ll do our best to ensure you have the support you need to have a stress free pregnancy. We can work together on what this support looks like so we are not imposing on you too much.

Open communication: We promise to be open and transparent with you and as the saying goes, “we listen and we don’t judge”.

Respect: Pregnancy, let alone carrying someone else’s baby is no easy feat and with it, comes the emotional, physical, mental toll that it brings. Sometimes life throws unexpected things at you and we’ll always respect any decision you make that put you and your family’s wellbeing and interests first.

Lifelong friendship: Only if this is something that you’d like - no pressure. We’d love for our child to know who their surrogate was and continue to be friends with the person who so selflessy put others first and gave us a gift that we’d be eternally grateful for.

As long as you’re in New Zealand, location is not an issue for us.

While being close geographically to our surrogate would be a bonus, what matters most is that we are the right fit for each other!

If you’re not in the regions closest to us, we promise to make an effort to get to know you in person, not just online.

Adoption is very rare in New Zealand.

The Oranga Tamariki Act 1989, Part 2, Section 13, 2, i, (iii), (A) states that: preference should be given to placing the child or young person with a member of the child’s or young person’s wider family, whānau, hapū, iwi, or family group who is able to meet their needs, including for a safe, stable, and loving home:

Source: Oranga Tamariki Act 1989

Oranga Tamariki do place children and young people with non-whānau foster carers/caregivers for temporary care and this is something we may be look at in the future.

Overseas adoption seems to be a non-starter unfortunately for gay couples outside of the host country.

Absolutely, when the time is right.

Right now, for the rest of 2026 at least, we would like to put all our energy into finding a surrogate.

If, along the way, we make a connection with fellow intending parent or parents who are looking for a sperm donor, we’re open to having conversations about this, without any added pressure.